An Ode to My Boys

Thank all the Gods for a rich inner life. I have been up nights, then rise early morning to YouTube, then muse all the live long day, and smile to myself like a crazy person while running errands because my thoughts are all of Nagron. It's the Domino effect of reading a book, then coming across Tumblr and fan sites and linking up with work that is similar to that single, and singular, book. The book is The Captive Prince, and Nagron refers to the characters of Agron and Nasir (such is the Brangelina effect of coining couple names which is seriously disturbing but what can you do) in the TV series Spartacus.

Really, Dan Feuerriegel and Pana Hema Taylor make Spartacus what it is to me: Timeless, and an ode to accomplished actors who can basically change your life by making you think about the nature of Love.

Nagron combine supreme fighting skills (gorgeously choreographed) with a romance made up of glances - that have the weight of a hundred explicit imaginings. You wish, idiotically, that the real world had heroes who fought for the unwinnable cause, merely because it is right. But, as it always is, it's the love that you remember. (Or as fans on the Net say, the Feels. So funny.)

The series is brilliantly made with that comic-book cinematography which has also placed Sin City and 300 in a unique slot, slo-mo and a chiaroscuro effect with the use of theatrical blood and gore being a part of it, but it is in Spartacus' directors that the core lies. There are nuances here that simply take your breath away.

The Castus-Agron-Nasir play had me gasping like a maiden aunt. When Agron 'commands' (he can't talk any other way) his rival Castus to remove his hand from Nasir, he holds out his own arm against Nasir's body, gently moving him away. For a man whose raison d'etre is the battlefield, that gentleness is the viewer's undoing. When Nasir makes him understand that his feelings are very real, the uncertainty in Agron's face, in that face that is so very sure of everything else, everywhere else will, I assure you, make you tear up like a putz.

But you have to see these actors in action to get their full appeal, one that thousands of disciples are languishing over as we speak. Dan and Pan (yes, we're on a first-name basis) are both straight and yet play lovers with an ease and passion that is astonishing. Cut to Colin Farrell wincing his way through a chaste and utterly uninspiring male kiss in Alexander (the way we winced through the entire movie) and you'll understand what a job my boys have done.

The entire cast, no exceptions, are the best we've seen on TV in years (I especially like Manu Bennett and Viva Bianca, and always mourn that beautiful man Andy Whitfield, the first Spartacus, lost to cancer), but they fade when faced with Nagron.

There is a reason why Dan Feuerriegel has a larger appeal than Pana, by the way.

1. While both are dropdead divine, Pana is married, Dan gloriously single.
2. Dan is an inveterate Tweeter and Instagramer. He even responds to fans' questions via webcam... is this an Aussie thing? I can't imagine an American star having such an appreciation for his reach no matter how late it was in coming. Pana is much more reserved going by his slight FB and Twitter presence.
3. Did you see Dan's photoshoot in the coffeetable tome In the Tub by TJ Scott? He was – barely – in it. 'Nuff said.

PS. A striking comment on YouTube was from someone who asked the immortal question: why do straight actors play gay characters so well? I have another: Why does gay love seem so much more intense, and so much more appealing, than hetero love? The answers may be a bit uncomfortable, so I'll give them only if you ask.

I leave you with this, (an insider thing, I'm sorry to say, but for those who have seen the show, priceless), again from fandom across the globe, a community which I really have come to appreciate: You mean we're not alone?

Superimposed over Agron's smouldering face:

“You Think I Can't Fight Because I Can't Hold A Sword?

Bitch I Survived Crucifixion.

I'm Jesus.”

My captive heart

I would like to believe that the life-changing books I discover are God's way of leading me onto the path of forgiveness. Mine towards Him. For screwing me over. But alas, there is, of course, no God. And I have to sublimate my pain over this non-life I live through wonders like The Captive Prince.

It piqued my curiousity after the third time I read a fan tribute on separate book sites, so I downloaded the damn thing just to get over another disappointment and you know, move on. (It was much like how I first read Brothers Karamazov: by stumbling across references to it in practically everything I was reading at the tender age of 16. And boy, did THAT book screw me over.)

But really, S.U.Pacat (not, I am certain, her real name although she may indeed be a very cool supercat) can write. Practically every page sings an aria like a stab through the heart, and you read and re-read immediately, thinking, no, she can't be this good. But she is. She has created a world from long ago where duelling princes find themselves and each other, making it so much more than a fascinating account of war tactics, or good v evil.

Damen is betrayed by his brother Kastor and lover Jocaste and sent into captivity where he meets the supercilious Laurent, neighbouring prince and all-out SOB. No one knows Damen's royal identity and the revelations of character that follow are utterly absorbing.

The interesting thing here is that what is 'good' and what 'evil' disappears like the best intentions when faced with Nutella or Tyler Hoechlin; with the latter you simply cave in and indulge, with the former your worldview is wrenched from its moorings.

A very clever twist to the tale is how Supacat has made heterosexuality taboo in her world, the norm is gay pairings. How smart is that in an instinctively homophobic world/readership.

She may slip now and then, using words like pellucid and mordant; they “gaze at each other” a bit too often, and once, shockingly, the phrase 'No kidding' emerged out of another century, but I will forgive her anything.

The last word must belong to either Damen or Laurent. Their dialogues are so clever, so subtle, so funny, so, and this is what kills me every single time, whether in the real or unreal world, so True.

My favourite early scene between Damen and Laurent is in the baths (Volume 1) where Damen senses the danger for the first time, although Laurent has already done so. He tells Damen: “Don't be presumptuous”. Damen sneers, “Too late, sweetheart”.

Or “Is there anyone at this court who isn't my enemy?"

"Not if I can help it," Laurent said.

― S.U. Pacat, Captive Prince: Volume One

But the following is powerful as well:

'That isn't why. She would have chosen him even if you'd had royal blood in your veins, even if you'd had the same blood as Kastor. You don't understand the way a mind like that thinks. I do. If I were Jokaste and a king maker, I'd have chosen Kastor over you too.'

'I suppose you are going to enjoy telling me why,' said Damen. He felt his hands curl into fists, heard the bitterness in his throat.

'Because a king maker would always choose the weaker man. The weaker the man, the easier he is to control.”

'She was intelligent, accomplished, beautiful. She was everything I could have asked for in a woman. But she was a king maker. She wanted power. She must have thought her only path to the throne was through Kastor.'

'My honourable barbarian. I wouldn't have picked that as your type.'

'Type?'

'A pretty face, a devious mind and a ruthless nature.”

'He was not wearing the woollen cap. His newly minted hair was uncovered, and he looked as fresh as he had emerging from the baths the night before, as he had waking beneath Damen's hands. But he had resumed the cool restraint, his jacket laced, his expression disagreeable from the haughty profile to the intolerant blue eyes.

'You're alive,' Damen said, and the words came out on a rush of relief that made him feel weak.

'I'm alive,' said Laurent. They were gazing at one another. 'I wasn't sure you'd come back.'

'I came back,' said Damen.”

― S.U. Pacat, Captive Prince: Volume Two